Nobodyregiftsthis one.
Award-winning alcohol-free wine, in a box built to be opened in front of people. You write the note. We handle the rest. From $59.
- Free shipping over $75
- Gift note at checkout
- No prices in the box
- Ships in 1–2 business days
included0.0%
alcohol
Better than a candle. Cheaper than a scandal.
It does not get regifted
A bottle of wine gets passed along. A bottle nobody else can buy in a supermarket gets opened.
Works for the sober friend
Zero alcohol, so it lands for someone taking a break without making the break the subject.
The note is yours
Write it at checkout. We print it in a hand-written style and slip it in the box. No price, no invoice.
Plain box, loud contents
The outer carton is unbranded and discreet. Everything good is waiting on the inside.
How much do you like them?
Three tiers. One decision. Shipping’s on us from $75, which the middle one already clears.
The Gift Box
$59
One bottle, fully wrapped
Birthdays, housewarmings, thank-yous, "congrats on the thing".
- Your pick of Red Blend or Chardonnay
- Premium gift box and bottle sleeve
- Tasting card, coaster, and your note
Send two
118
Two boxes, shipping on us
Couples, hosts, and anyone who deserves both colours.
- Clears the 75 free-shipping line
- One red, one white — no guessing their side
- Add both to your bag, one order, one note
Main Character Case
$199
Six bottles, host kit included
Weddings, big thank-yous, the client you want to keep.
- Six 750 ml bottles in your chosen mix
- Host guide and food-pairing cards
- Priced below buying six bottles loose
Three steps. No wrapping paper.
01
Pick red or white
Or send both and stay out of the argument entirely.
02
Write the note
One line at checkout. Funny beats formal, every time.
03
We wrap and ship
Out in 1–2 business days, tracked to their door.
The questions gift buyers ask
Does the person receiving an alcohol-free wine gift need to be 21?
Yes. LOUDMOUTH contains hemp-derived Delta-9 THC and is sold to adults 21 and over only. An adult 21+ must be available to receive the delivery, and age verification is required on delivery in some areas. Do not send it to a workplace mailroom or a college dorm desk.
Can I include a message with the gift?
Yes. You write the note at checkout and we print it on a card in a hand-written style and place it inside the gift box. There is no invoice or price anywhere in the box.
Will they know how much it cost?
No. Nothing in the box shows a price. The receipt goes to your email only, and the outer shipping carton is plain and unbranded — the presentation starts when they open it.
What is actually in the gift box?
One 750 ml bottle of alcohol-free wine in your choice of Red Blend or Chardonnay, a premium gift box and bottle sleeve, a collectible tasting card, a coaster, and your gift note.
Is alcohol-free wine a good gift for someone not drinking?
It is one of the few gifts that works for someone who is off alcohol without pointing at the fact. It looks and pours like wine, so they are holding the same glass as everyone else. It is not suitable for anyone pregnant, nursing, or avoiding THC.
Can I send gifts to more than one address?
Each order ships to a single address, so place a separate order for each recipient. Orders over $75 ship free, which two gift boxes clear on their own.
How fast does it ship?
Orders leave the warehouse in 1 to 2 business days and ship within the United States. Some state restrictions apply. Order a week ahead for a dated occasion.
Send it before you overthink it
Two gift boxes ship free. One ships fast. Doing nothing ships nothing.
21+ only · Recipient must be 21+ · Lab tested · Ships within the US · Do not drive after consuming